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The Old Lady in My Bones

Reclaiming My Morning

DSC_2589I was the ultimate morning person. Mornings belonged to me – they were the most peaceful and productive part of my day. There’s nothing else quite like waking to a red sky burning along the horizon, the staccato rhythm of rain drumming on the roof, the chipper melodies of the birds and whisper of light breezes stroking the leaves. I would sit on my patio, after the satisfying burn of a workout, hot coffee in hand, watching the curl of steam rise up out of the hot liquid into a new dawn. Afternoons were always prone to lethargy and I could always plod through them with a shot of espresso or a breath of fresh air, but mornings were the most stimulating part of my day.

Then RA came along and stole them from me. My body sunk into the swamp of perpetual fatigue, protesting at every movement. I went from bouncy and energetic to lazy and sluggish, my body riddled with the stale heat of inflammation. My mind was alert but my body wasn’t. I would open my eyes and see the daylight streaming through the curtains, hear the fluttering animation outside my window, and inhale the rich fragrance of coffee brewing in the kitchen. The list of all the things I wanted to accomplish ran through my mind like a ticker-tape parade and yet, my body rebelled against movement. My legs mired in the cement of fatigue, it took an enormous effort to pull my sore stiff body from bed. I couldn’t make my joints function, I couldn’t ignite the spark to thrust me into the day.

I have lived with this disease long enough to recognize its capricious machinations, but one thing that never changes is how I feel the first thing in the morning. It’s that regularity that will help me cheat RA and, bit by bit, take back my mornings. It starts with opening my eyes. I take a few moments to assess the situation – flex an ankle, stretch a knee, bend my fingers. I breathe in and sit up. I am already halfway there. I am weary and stiff, the cool morning assaulting my rigid joints, making them want to shrink back into the warmth of my bed. But I am already in motion and this is the most difficult part – once I can start moving and warm up, the rest of me will follow suit. I do the slow shuffle to the bathroom, and then to the kitchen – some mornings require a hot bath and gentle yoga; other mornings just some stepping and stretching will do. RA tries to steal our mornings from us but I am determined to reclaim them. I don’t have to engage in intense exercise or run marathons – all I have to do is stand up, move around, and focus on the goals of my day and, once again, recharge in the pastel light of daybreak.

I haven’t let RA stop me from my aspirations. Why should my mornings be any different? For all we have to sacrifice, don’t we deserve to enjoy the bare necessities of life? All the exquisite moments that only the mornings can deliver – the ginger blush of sunlight burning through the soft mist of a new dawn, the stillness of the serenity of home before the hum of traffic and the frantic activity of the outside world takes over, indulge in that bit of private time just for me to blend the colors of my day. It won’t be easy. There will be mornings that I will not want to get out of bed, but then I would miss out on all the delightful wonders we breathe into an exquisite world. I am ready to reclaim my mornings and I hope that you too will find those cherished days to share with me.

 

 

About J.G. Chayko

I am a writer living on the beautiful West Coast in Vancouver B.C. I am a poet at heart but also write prose, fiction and creative non-fiction. In my thirties, while working for a Rheumatology clinic, I was diagnosed with early Rheumatoid Arthritis. I created " The Old Lady In My Bones" to share my experience living with this disease and to create an awareness that arthritis touches people of all ages, not just the elderly.

Discussion

8 thoughts on “Reclaiming My Morning

  1. Yes! Take those mornings back and reclaim them for yourself.
    Also, happy Valentine’s Day! Sending you my love.

    Posted by aspiringwriter22 | February 14, 2016, 7:52 pm
  2. For me the worst part of RA mornings is when they follow a night of RA sleeplessness. Yuk! But your post was enough to inspire me to get up and do something. 🙂 May you have many happy, energetic, productive mornings.

    Posted by Carla Kienast | February 15, 2016, 7:41 am
    • Yes I agree, a sleepless night can make the morning twice as hard. I feel that when spring brings brighter days and warmer temperatures I can reclaim more mornings – and I hope you find some enjoyable morning moments. Stay well X

      Posted by J.G. Chayko | February 15, 2016, 10:14 am
  3. Yes! As a morning person myself, I can totally relate. I remember mornings when it took all my energy to make it down the stairs to the kitchen. I was then too exhausted to embrace the wonder that comes with early mornings. Most days now we are good friends again. Good luck on your journey back to the best time of the day.

    Posted by Cathy | February 17, 2016, 6:05 am
  4. I’ve always been an evening person. It’s when I’m most alert and productive. But I can relate to testing the waters after waking up. I still flex my fingers upon waking to see how flexible or inflexible they are. It’s an ingrained habit now.

    Posted by irmaanavarro | February 18, 2016, 7:12 am
    • I’ve always been more relaxed in the evenings, especially since I put so much energy into my days. I find that even with RA, my mind can still be more alert in the mornings. Thank you for sharing – stay well 🙂

      Posted by J.G. Chayko | February 18, 2016, 3:24 pm

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